K04: Gamera vs. Barugon

by Trey Yeatts

I told you that introducing Frisbees to Japan would be a bad idea.
The Frisbee is a classic toy, a plastic disc that can fly for quite a distance when skimmed flat through the air. It is manufactured by Wham-O.

It's Zen.
Zen is a school of Buddhist thought, known for emphasizing meditative or “deeper” meanings.

What's the Blue Book value on a giant opal?
Kelley Blue Book is an automotive valuation company whose practice of estimating the value of vehicles has become so well known that “blue book” has become shorthand for “market value.” Opel is a well-known German car company; it has been a subsidiary of GM since 1929.

Mr. Tea Leaf!
Mr. T (a.k.a. Laurence Tureaud) is an actor best known in the 1980s for his mohawk, gold chains, muscle shirt and physique on The A-Team and in Rocky III. “I pity the fool!” was his catchphrase.

I like the Saran skirts.
Saran is a thin, transparent polymer best known for its usage in Saran Wrap, the clingy and clear film used to cover foodstuffs. It was invented in 1933.

Hey, it's Bob Hope!
Comedian Bob Hope (1903-2003) was well-known for his military performances for the United Services Organization, a tradition that began in World War II and continued through Korea, Vietnam and the Persian Gulf. In 1997 Congress made Hope an “honorary veteran” in recognition of his efforts to support the troops over the years.

Attention personnel, incoming wounded ... Oh, sorry. That's M*A*S*H.
This was a frequently repeated line on the television series M*A*S*H, which aired from 1972-1983. It was spoken by the P.A. announcer, who was played at various times by Todd Susman and Sal Viscuso.

It's Albert Schweitzer.
Albert Schweitzer (1875-1965) was a Nobel Prize-winning philosopher, theologian and physician known for his selfless devotion and his views on “the Reverence for Life.”

I've opened up a fried chicken chain.
Colonel Harland Sanders was the man who, in 1940, came up with the famous “original recipe” and founded Kentucky Fried Chicken. He died in 1980.

The land of Dairy Queen.
A reference to an old advertising jingle for the chain of restaurants: “In the land of Dairy Queen, we treat you right!”

Could be Dracula.
Dracula is the villainous vampire of the Bram Stoker novel by the same name. Stoker based the character loosely on Vlad the Impaler, a fifteenth-century Wallachian prince who was notorious for his cruelty.

You know, he's got the skeletal structure of Sgt. Vince Carter.
Long-suffering Sergeant Vince Carter was Gomer Pyle’s drill sergeant on the TV series Gomer Pyle, U.S.M.C. (1964-1969). The part was played by Frank Sutton.

Pyle! That's Japanese for “Pyle!”
The oft-heard exclamation of Sgt. Carter in response to the antics of Private Gomer Pyle (Jim Nabors). See previous note.

It was a container of pantyhose.
Pantyhose brand L'eggs was famously sold in plastic egg-shaped containers starting in 1969. In 1991 the company phased out the containers in favor of cardboard boxes, citing the higher transportation and packing costs associated with the oddly shaped eggs.

It's Son of Flubber.
Flubber is the anti-gravity goop that makes it possible for Fred MacMurray to fly in the 1961 film The Absent-Minded Professor. Son of Flubber was the 1963 sequel.

A hydrospa? A hydrospa turned up real high. –Extra Jacuzzi action.
A Jacuzzi is a trademarked brand of water jet hot tub (or hydro spa); they also make whirlpool tubs, luxury showers, swimming pool equipment, and more.

Do you realize how much the insurance rates must be in downtown Tokyo? Those Godzillas coming through there.
Godzilla is another Japanese monster character that rampages through Tokyo in most of his nearly thirty films. He appears in Show 212, Godzilla vs. Megalon.

Way to go, Mr. Freudian Slip.
Known as parapraxis, Freudian slips are errors in speech or actions that are thought to be influenced by unconscious thought, and therefore revealing of the true feelings of the person committing the error. Freudian slips are named after famed psychologist Sigmund Freud (1856-1939).

Here comes Lassie.
Lassie was a hyperintelligent collie who starred in an eponymous TV series, which aired from 1954-1974, as well as a series of movies. She starred in Show 510, The Painted Hills.

It's a Frosty maker. Turn any five-ton tank into a Slurpee.
Frosty is the name given to a chilled shake-like dessert at the fast food chain Wendy's. Slurpee is the name of convenience store 7-Eleven's brand of flavored ice drinks.

Snowstorm in China. The most beautiful effect in magic.
Snowstorm in China is a famous magic trick, often performed by Joel Hodgson in his early days on stage.

Perhaps bringing back the tradition of kamikaze would be a good idea.
Kamikaze (usually translated as “divine wind”) was the suicidal tactic used by Japanese military pilots of crashing their planes into Allied naval vessels during World War II.

It's just a tongue. –But what a tongue. –Like Gene Simmons.
Gene “The Demon” Simmons, bassist for the rock band Kiss, was known for his abnormally long tongue, as well as for spitting blood and fire.

Is that Jack Webb in the corner?
Jack Webb played Sergeant Joe Friday on the TV cop show Dragnet (1951-1959).

Crow, will you grab the ChapStick on your way in?
ChapStick is a lip balm developed in the 1880s by Dr. Charles Browne Fleet. It is manufactured by Wyeth.

He stepped on a thorn.
Probably a reference to the Aesop fable “Androcles and the Lion,” wherein a lion is injured by a thorn in its paw and an escaped slave helps remove it; George Bernard Shaw wrote a 1912 play by the same name retelling the story.

High noon. [Whistled.] The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly theme.
In most westerns, “high noon” was the usual time for a gunfight. Servo is whistling the famous theme to the 1966 spaghetti western The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly, written by composer John Morricone.

There's time! There's time!
Possibly a reference to the famous The Twilight Zone episode “Time Enough At Last,” starring Burgess Meredith. In it, Meredith's put-upon character revels at having survived a nuclear holocaust because “there's time enough at last” to devote to his true passion, reading.

Turtle Slurpee.
See note on Slurpees, above.

A hunka hunka burning love.
A line from the Elvis Presley song “Burning Love.”

The emotion! The pathos! Ten years at Juilliard to act in a rubber suit.
The Juilliard School, located in New York City, was founded in 1905. It's considered one of the most prestigious performing arts conservatories in the world. Notable alumni of its drama school include Kevin Spacey, Kevin Kline, and William Hurt.

Looks like he's bleeding Kem-Tone paint.
Kem-Tone was the first commercially successful water-based interior paint, introduced by Sherwin-Williams in 1941 due to the shortage of oil-based paints required for wartime production. It quickly became one of the best-selling paints in the United States.

He works for Michael Jackson.
The so-called “King of Pop,” Michael Jackson (1958-2009) was known for the odd use of his wealth over the years, including the attempted purchase of Joseph “Elephant Man” Merrick's bones from London Hospital where they were kept. Both his first offer ($500,000) and his second offer ($1 million) were rejected.

Who decorates their apartment, Don Ho?
Don Ho (1930-2007) was a Hawaiian singer familiar to many through his regular gig at Duke’s nightclub in Waikiki, although he also appeared in Los Angeles, Las Vegas, New York, and elsewhere and released a number of albums.

I think Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is an actor and martial arts expert who has appeared in many films, including Way of the Dragon with Bruce Lee, and in the long-running TV series Walker, Texas Ranger.

Maybe she didn't have a Band-Aid.
Band-Aid is a brand of adhesive bandage invented in 1920 and manufactured by Johnson & Johnson.

I was tied to Lech Walesa once.
Lech Walesa is a Polish labor leader who from 1980-1990 formed the country’s first labor union under the communist government that then ran Poland. After the Soviet satellite states collapsed at the beginning of the 1990s, Walesa became president of the newly democratic Poland for five years (1990-1995).

Carol Channing had that.
Carol Channing starred in the 1949 Jule Styne Broadway musical Gentlemen Prefer Blondes, which featured the song, “Diamonds Are a Girl's Best Friend.” In the 1953 film version of the musical, the part was played by Marilyn Monroe.

What about ChapStick? That would kill him.
See note on ChapStick, above.

They tricked the monster into thinking it's Sammy Davis.
Sammy Davis Jr. (1925-1990) was a Las Vegas staple and a member of Hollywood’s Rat Pack. He was known for his sense of style and a predilection for audacious jewelry.

A kiss on the hand may be quite continental but ... –Diamonds ... –Are a lizard's ... –Worst nightmare.
A paraphrase of the lyrics to “Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend” (see above note).

Carol Channing's a lizard.
See above note.

“This gentleman is Dr. Sato.” The shoe designer?
Sato Shoes Studio was founded in 1903 in Karuizawa, Japan. Initially they produced handmade traditional Japanese wooden shoes; today, they sell more contemporary designs.

Looks like he's been using too much grape-flavored ChapStick.
See note on ChapStick, above.

Thanks. I needed that.
Possibly a reference to a line by John Belushi's character, Bluto, in 1978's Animal House, or perhaps to the early ’80s ads by Mennen for Skin Bracer wherein a man slaps himself in the face (John Goodman starred in some of those ads).

That's no ordinary speedboat. –That's a battle station.
A paraphrase of a line from the 1977 film Star Wars: “That’s no moon. It’s a space station.”

[Sung.] A three-hour tour ...
A line from the theme song to the TV series Gilligan’s Island, which aired from 1964-1967.

[Sung.] “He's always chasing rainbows” ... Sorry.
“I'm Always Chasing Rainbows” is a song written by Harry Carroll in 1917. It was sung by Judy Garland in the 1941 film Ziegfeld Girl and has been covered by people as diverse as Tony Bennett and Alice Cooper.

I think they should call it “Rainbow Connection.”
“Rainbow Connection” is a song written by Paul Williams and Kenneth Ascher, performed by Jim Henson (as Kermit the Frog) in the 1979 film The Muppet Movie.

You know guys, I get the stinking suspicion that the Lucky Charms leprechaun is involved in this somehow.
Lucky Charms is a cereal produced by General Mills since 1964. Its mascot is a leprechaun, Lucky, who is always trying to protect his cereal from children.

Giant mutant reptiles, on the next Geraldo.
Geraldo was a syndicated daytime TV talk show hosted by Geraldo Rivera from 1987-1998. Very often, the show's topics were salacious and on one occasion led to a well-publicized brawl between white supremacists and black activists that left Rivera with a broken nose.

Giant mutant reptiles and the women who love them.
A reference to the venerable self-help book Men Who Hate Women & the Women Who Love Them by Susan Forward and Joan Torres.

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